Wednesday, April 15, 2009

America's Next Top Model Cycle 12 - Midseason Recap

So - has anyone been watching America's Next Top Model Cycle 12? Or am I alone in this shameful habit?

If you're familiar with the show's formula, this will get you up to speed on this season: So far we've gone past the makeover episode (aka the crying episode), the Benny Ninja appearance, the awkward fashion show, the acting class and the television commercial shoot, not to mention the return of last season's winner (in this case, the awkward McKey) with scripted words of wisdom from her past year of "being a working model." (Outside of her Cover Girl contract - entailing a string of poorly delivered commercials - and the Tibi show the commercial claims she walked in, I'd love to learn what other "work" she has been doing...)

Last week the burn victim with the soccer mom face, Tahlia (pictured above), was eliminated, just as all of the models who are admitted to the competition mainly to promote a cause or bust a stereotype tend to be about halfway through ("I'm bi-racial" "I was brutally circumcised" "I have a dick" etc.)

What anyone who knows anything about modeling will have noticed is the fact that every season, the judges are grooming the models for a vein of the industry in which they will ultimately not be performing in. Catalog and commercial models are an entirely different species than runway and editorial high fashion models. And what job do America's Top Model winners land? Spokesperson for a company that sells makeup at Wal-Mart!!!
Of all of the remaining contestants, Teyona and her freaky alien head, Allison and her freaky gigantic eyes and Celia with her uber-angular face are the only ones who could viably exist as high fashion models - however, Allison is probably too short to do runway.

London and Fo are the most consumer-friendly faces/personalities (despite London's burning passion for Jesus) and are my bets for the final two contestants. They look like commercial models, and are well suited for Seventeen Magazine and Cover Girl.

Natalie has been a strong competitor since the start, and while she too is a catalog model, she looks older and more suited for Victoria's Secret type jobs. I though the same thing about Kortnie (who was eliminated a couple weeks back.) P.S. Does anyone else think Kortnie had a nose job? Click the image to enlarge - looks a little pinched, no?


Tonight Ciara will visit the girls and put them in a music video. My bet for elimination is Allison or Aminat (above). Aminat looks like a cartoon alligator and has no place in the competition outside of her height and alarming thinness.

Update: They gave London the boot tonight for her "major weight gain." Supposedly she packed on 10-15 lbs. since tryouts. WHAT? The girl was as thin as a floorboard. If the aim of the weight subplot was to make the hoards of teenaged girls who make up ANTM's audience understand how totally whack the modeling industry is, fine. I'd argue that making and issue of London's weight when she was already unattainably thin was irresponsible.

Whatever. So now I'm like 80% sure Fo is going to win the whole thing.

Next week the remaining 6 actresses contestants go to Brazil.

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